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15 Fantastic NFL Names
published June 2, 2009

Well after going through the rosters of 2008 football players (with the exception of a couple honorable mentions), I come upon my favorite names in the NFL. This was particularly difficult just because there's so damn many of em! I can safely say that I would probably trade my name for any of the following names. There's also a bonus in this article, what these awesome names would be, if they weren't in the NFL.

15. Ty Law * Lawyer Milloy - No one messes with... "THE LAW." Except maybe the Judge (Reinhold)

 

14. Teddy Bruschi * Sam Adams - These guys would be a stoked version of our founding fathers.

 

13 . D'Brickashaw Ferguson - Brick Ferguson, it's a funny name.

 

12. Quentin Jammer - Slam Bam Jam with Quentin Jammer. Based on my favorite anti-drug artist .

 

11. Madison Hedgecock - The mythical goat slaying rooster of Madison, Wisconsin.

 

10. Marc Bulger - Ladies love Marc's bulge.

 

9. Deuce McAllister - Usually when I have to take an enormous crap, I say "I'm takin a Deuce McAllister."

 

8. Duce Staley - Once I'm done with the "Deuce McAllister," it starts smelling like a Duce Staley.

 

7. Cadillac WIlliams - It's quite possible that this actuallly is Cadillac WIlliams.

 

6. Amani Toomer - Fantastic name, but I would hate to have an Amani Tumor.

 

 

5. Reuben Droughns - The night of the living (Reuben) Drones!

 

4. Ebenezer Ekuban - Ekuban is Samoan for "Scrooge," showing that even in happy tropical cultures there an crabby old Jew who hates their joy.

 

3. Clint Session - "Say there, you interested in a session?"

 

2. Champ Bailey - Champburger, Hail to the Champ

 

1. Priest Holmes - Woah, it's Cadillac WIlliams... but a priest!

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